The work life nightmare....

[-GoBengals-]

not sure if i am just venting or looking for advice, but my work life has gone to hell, and i cant "afford" to leave, and also am "scared" to leave..

Been with my current employer for 10 years, been a pretty easy ride, easy work, went from sales which i was tired of before i started, to tech work, to leading a tech screw, to leading a district of tech screws, to mostly leading a single tech crew again( the district tech screw job title was never an official job and sort of fizzled away). 

History: i did sales for 1 years at company A, 3.5 years at company B, and 2-3 years at my current employer, so i have 7-ish years of sales experience, and then nearly 8 years of tech experience, which involves the tech work, but also inventory, time management, etc.

Recently, about 2-2.5 years ago, a new district manager over 12 locations took over, ran TONS of good people out, claiming they were bad managers, micromanaging everyone, burning everyone out, they all left and got other jobs, the few good ones that stayed, JUST left, there was an opportunity to move back to the sales side, managing a single store, 8 people under me, working about the same distance from home.. everyone wanted me, district manager, etc, the director shot it down, stating he didnt want to promote technicians to sales management positions(never publicly said this, but was well known), so i got hosed out of that gig, another of the SAME jobs came open, way further from home, but with a guy i liked working with and trusted to have my back.

So he pushed for it, old district manager was forced out, new district manger came in, met with me, and both pushed for me to get it, and i got it.

great right? well in my old position, i knew everyones salary, there were 3-4 others at that same position, one made more than i did previously, one made slightly less, but was way newer to the company, and a few other brand new guys made a little more less, so the common expectation was that pay stays the same, and the big pay raise was the commission increase from a $330 monthly bonus, of which we normally earned 75% of, to $1,300/mo which was normally exceeded.

I was offered a salary WAY below my current base, $4,500 less. i attempted to ask for more, stating the obvious experience, etc, and was told take it or leave it basically. they knew they had me over a barrel, basically a 12-14% pay cut, so i took it based on the commission being higher, risky to an extent, but even if we came up short i should make a LITTLE more.. and break even with the longer drive(twice as far).

The city of Denver is split into 2 districts, north, and south, i live far south suburbs, always worked in the south, honestly dislike many, not all, but many managers from the north.

So i find out 5 weeks into my new job, that they are re-aligning stores, and we will be part of the north district.

Fuck. now my peers are folks i dont much care for, the stores easiest to get promoted into, around, are all hella far from my house, and there is always that risk, that the new district manager will want to put some of his "buddies" into my location, which is a top 3 location in the state. Which could try to force me to another store, or out of the company. At will state they can fuck you pretty easily.

So now, i work further than i want to, for less pay than i am worth, for people i dont know, WITH people i dont like, and have fear for job security.

So my co worker and i discussed out situation, we both run the location, and decided to stick where we are, kick ass in sales, and fight for our spot.

Cool, however our best sale person, who out of 6 sales people, accounts for 35% of the stores sales currently, so doing the job of 2-3 people himself, has decided to move back to california, so we are fucked once he goes, very hard to replace this guy, speaks spanish, knows sales well, great sales person, great to have.

so on top of the other things, hitting our sales goals are going to be VERY tough, AND thats going to make keeping our spot, not getting fired, etc, harder and harder.

i cant really o back where i was, i was replaced, and the new boss there is a power tripping weirdo with a strange personality.

As a side detail, there was a bunch of fraud going on in the south district, none of which has anything to do with me, i wasnt in sales at all, but a few managers quit or will be fired this or next week. 

So several spots are going to open up, which would be considered promotions, HOWEVER, company "rule" you must be in your position for 1 years before being promoted, this CAN be overlooked with district manager and director approval.

I have kissed some ass and earned some brownie points with both in the last two months, i dont know if it would be enough to earn one of those spots, if i could, it would be an additional$5k raise, and shorten my drive to work by half, job security isnt GREAT, but i dont think i would fail, depends on many factors, the worse my staff would be the worse my sales would be and the more work that puts on me to do myself.

Now to even apply, i would ahve to reach out to the district manager i am leaving, reach out to the district manager i am going to, get both approval, get them to get approval from the director, AND my pal i like working with, technically my boss, would be alerted of me trying to leave his store. which is a HUGE asshole move, after he just fought for me to get there with him. He wouldnt hate me, because its an opportunity, but he wouldnt be happy. it could all be for nothing and not even get the job. and piss everyone off.

My old job had NO promotional tree, there were 3 people between me and the CEO, a Tech support specialist, the VP of tech, and the president of tech, then the CEO. Keep in mind i am not very high in the company, but the promotional ladder doesnt exist on that side. So the sales side was my only option to EVER move up.

Other info: I get 7 weeks of paid vacation currently, health care is GREAT, cost $60/paycheck covers the family, and we havent paid a cent in healthy care, including a $14,000 ER viist, in 3 years, not a cent. So there are great perks.

But i have gone from a job i could do in my sleep, for decent money, to a job thats a little hassle, but really stressful from all of the things above, to questioning job security etc.

I am concerned about leaving what i know, i am devastated at the thought of leaving my 7 weeks of vacation, and great health care, free phone service, etc.

i have gone from chillin, to all my friends gone, worried, stressed and working 50-55 hours a week to make sure i make enough money and everything it taken care of at work.

Took the family on a few extravagant vacations this year, cost a shitload of money, so i have a fuckton of credit card debt currently, so i literally cant afford to take a cent pay cut, if i leave i need to make 60k wherever i go, which isnt easy to walk into anywhere and make $60k, its not a ton, but i have no degree, just a pile of specific experience.

Going to a competitor is virtually impossible, one competitor 99.9% hires from within only, another is union and tough to come in at my same level for that reason, the last one is constantly trying to sell itself off, and i worked there before.

...fuck

i am miserable, i never see my kids, im exhausted, my wife is a pain in the butt most of the time, she complains about working at all, wants to sit home or do her side businesses full time (not currently possible) she wasnt really raised with any responsibility to maturity involved, if it werent for me we would be living in an apartment in ohio making 70% of what we do, both hating our jobs, etc.

So everything is my responsability, bills, kids, house, food, education, clothes, holidays, gifts, planning, money, everything.

I dont see any options that are good ones.

i am miserable and exhausted and stressed the fuck out.

am i missing anything? aside from playing the lotto, i am not seeing many options on getting out of this situation anytime soon.

 

[CincyInDC]

You have to do what's best for you and your family.  rationally weigh the risks and the benefits.  I commute 30 minutes each way between work and home, and I think that's too much. 

[-GoBengals-]

seems like the ONLY option for my family is dealing with it..

i was only driving like 9 miles before, 15-20 minutes tops, now its 35-40, if i hit no lights i could do like 15, but its busy road with a stoplight every 300 yards..

 

brutal..

 

shit will likely be hitting the fan, if its going to, within a few weeks.. so we shall see how it goes.

[-GoBengals-]

at 57 hrs this week.

 

looks like one of three things will happen to me in the next weeks

1. move to store closer to home with current boss

2. stay at current store working for other good friend of mine

3. working for another company for more money.

[|Numbers|]

These life dilemmas suck. In the end it's always been, for me anyways, what's best for the family. You'll make the right choice.

[fluhartz]

damn dude.. stress sucks and I know all about it...

I know everyone says it, but focus on the good things in your life.. Your wife and kids...that's the most important thing. The other shit in your life will work itself out, it always does.. I don't have any awesome advice that will fix all your shit, but you seem like a smart dude and I am sure you will figure things out..

 

that lotto thing would be sweet though...

[Enon Bengal]

On a personal note, I hate to be micromanged. I've only had two jobs since college and I left the first one because I had a boss that micromanaged me.

[sois]

life is dumb, I know some of those crappy experiences, hang in there sir

[-GoBengals-]

thanks all..

look like i am headed to the store closer to home with my current boss, the only variable after that is whether he stays or not..

[|Montana Bengal|]

thanks all..

look like i am headed to the store closer to home with my current boss, the only variable after that is whether he stays or not..

Is that a good thing?

[-GoBengals-]

pros and cons:

Pros:

15 minutes closer to home, 30 minutes less commute each day total.

its in the south district, which is where all of the stores i would be willing to work at are located, so makes promotions easier

the store has technicians, which is a huge plus, both personal gain and store traffic wise

i like my current boss, so im glad to be with him.

 

Cons:

staff mostly sucks, going to have to fire 3-4 people, some of which i would consider friends, at least work friends.

under a district manager we dont really care for or trust

if my boss leaves for another job, anything could happen, get a shitty replacement, work life suck again, etc.

 

so only time will tell. i need to take a few days off before november and december hit, or i am going to be too burned out to be much help around there..

[-GoBengals-]

so my company needs to cut 2.5 billion on operating costs and will be laying off people in the next six months.

2 of the last 3 times this type of announcement was made, they eliminated my current position, nationwide, i think 1% of the position remained.

 

 

[|Elflocko|]

Well, that's not good...

[|Montana Bengal|]

Really not good.

[BengalsOwn]

my wife is a pain in the butt most of the time, she complains about working at all, wants to sit home or do her side businesses full time (not currently possible) she wasnt really raised with any responsibility to maturity involved

So everything is my responsability, bills, kids, house, food, education, clothes, holidays, gifts, planning, money, everything.

 

Been there done that. I feel for you. 12 years I put up with that shit. While my 54 year old mother who has worked full time from the time I was six years old works her ass off as a janitor, doesn't bitch about it and really doesn't even need to work, she just does it because that's what adults do.

[sois]

so my company needs to cut 2.5 billion on operating costs and will be laying off people in the next six months.

2 of the last 3 times this type of announcement was made, they eliminated my current position, nationwide, i think 1% of the position remained.

 

 

sounds like my company!

[Gremzz]

Give yourself a timeline to see if things improve, at the very least you can spend (albeit what little you have) time to perhaps outsource other possibilities.
Seems as though it's a really tough spot, but nothing should be more important than you and your families health, that always comes first. That, and Bengals Football.

 

You'll find the right option, it's probably just tough as you're stuck inside you're own head trying to find a solution while you're dealing with 4,553,291 problems all at once. Hopefully you get some clarity soon. I guess my only advice would be look after yourself. You can always make more money, can't make more time....